Thursday, October 3, 2013

Welcome Back and ARW about Coconut Oil

I do apologize for my prolonged absence here; technical difficulties have at last been surmounted and I am back.

A reader writes with some very practical questions:

I have a very practical question, if I may. I see you recommend coconut oil as a lubricant and I like the idea but I have a few concerns. First, refined or unrefined (or both?), or does it not matter? Second, being used to coconut oil in the kitchen, I know it is rock solid in winter and liquid in summer. Does this pose problems for storage and deft deployment at the appropriate moment? Third, I can't help fearing it will be a bit messy. I know the Catholic way of sex is inherently beautifully messy, but worry the oil might damage my fabrics. This worry could, I forsee, dampen the full enjoyment of marital pleasure. Any thoughts you might have on these issues would be very welcome.

Wonderful question! I love practicalities, they are far too neglected in this world.

First, I will say that I do not think refined or unrefined matters; the two brands I have used are the one sold at Trader Joe's (doesn't say whether it is refined) and the one sold at Costco (unrefined). I haven't noticed a difference. 

This is the Costco brand

Second, coconut oil does vary in consistency depending on the seasons! What we do (and this idea is credited entirely to my husband) is take some out of the large container and fill a small tupperware with it (the very little ones, like the size of a baby food jar). We then keep that in a safe place somewhere near where we usually make love. (it does have the added advantage of being inconspicuous and also keeping our cooking & personal needs separate) If it is more like a liquid, then just a finger dip into it does the trick; if more solid, then rubbing the top gets enough free and it melts on contact with the skin after some more rubbing.

Trader Joe's Brand

I am grateful for your concern about your linens! So far, I have not noticed any problems with mine, although we do deploy the coconut oil strategically, that is to say - we don't use as massage oil (although that sounds lovely) - so there is less chance of it getting everywhere. My advice is to lay some towels down first if you use it more liberally. Otherwise, especially if you have nice plush carpet, you might embrace sex on the floor - or if you're daring, the shower. If you do figure out how to have shower sex, please let me know; it has puzzled me for years. 

Thanks so much for writing!


  1. On staining: cloth diapering parents love coconut oil for diaper rash, since it doesn't stain diapers the way most commercially available rash treatments do. :) Besides that, we use it for cooking, lubricant, and all manner of minor rashes or skin irritations. It's a great massage oil or even regular moisturizer.

    1. Yes, I have heard that. Coconut oil is becoming what Windex was for the father in MBFGW, yes? Can be used for anything! Around here we use breast milk, since we always have some lying around.

  2. Goodness. I use Coconut oil to have daily to cure me of sugar addiction. Works a treat. Never imagined using it before for a lubricant. Love it. Rather handy too as we have several jars in the kitchen. Full of creative ideas Mrs Chastity.

  3. 3 Studies REVEAL How Coconut Oil Kills Waist Fat.

    This means that you literally get rid of fat by consuming Coconut Fat (including coconut milk, coconut cream and coconut oil).

    These 3 studies from large medicinal journals are sure to turn the conventional nutrition world upside down!


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